Preparing Your Child to Handle Criticism

Preparing Your Child to Handle Criticism

 

As a parent or teacher, it’s important to spend time thinking about how to frame feedback for kids. Whilst the desire is to avoid upsetting them, we all recognise that over protecting a child sets him or her up as very vulnerable when it comes to venturing out of the home.

“The trick is to get your child to learn how to handle criticism gracefully and learn from it,” says Parents advisor Michele Borba, Ed.D., author of The Big Book of Parenting Solutions.

 

The first step is not to be afraid to offer criticism yourself. Imagine you have always been praised and never received feedback on how you could improve; you would certainly be taken aback if a teacher or new friend told you had done something wrong or suggested you did it another way. It’s your responsibility as a parent to introduce feedback to your child and to teach them the tools for reacting appropriately.

 

Praise where praise is due… and in proportion. This study highlights the adverse impact of inflated praise on children especially those with low self-esteem.

 

“…inflated praise decreases challenge seeking in children with low self-esteem and has the opposite effect on children with high self-esteem. These findings show that inflated praise, although well intended, may cause children with low self-esteem to avoid crucial learning experiences.” – Brummelman et al. in study, “That’s Not Just Beautiful—That’s Incredibly Beautiful!”

 

Once a child is familiar with criticism it’s important you help prepare your child to deal with it when it arises. Here are a few steps:

 

Talk about feelings.

The emotions you feel when receiving criticism are instinctive and, as it often is with children, the reaction might be disproportionate. Rude retorts, crying or complete withdrawal are all perfectly normal and it’s your job to try and help your child to unpack why they react in this way, so that next time they can better deal with the criticism and move forward from it. Asking them how the criticism made them feel helps them to understand it and allows them to recognise the feeling in the future.

 

Equip them with tools.

Giving examples of how to deal with criticism can be super useful. Every scenario is, of course, different but this article covers some good examples of criticism and what appropriate responses might be – definitely worth a read so you have some suggestions ready should a similar situation arise.

 

Body language.

It can be tricky to get everything right but what you say is just as important as how you say it. When preparing to talk to a child, uncross your arms, put yourself eye level with the child, smile and keep your face relaxed. If you are tense when you hand out criticism, they will be tense when they receive it.

 

Good, Better, Best.

Never Let it Rest,

Until the Good is Better

And the Better is Best.

 

No one likes to be criticised but it’s a hugely important part of learning and by helping your child to understand how to cope and respond can only set them up for better self-awareness and personal development in the future.

 

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Bedtime Reading

Bedtime Reading

The Importance of Bedtime Reading

It can be tough in busy, adult life to find time to read. Often the key is to create a daily routine, picking up a book at the same convenient time, every day. For your child, routine is especially important and as the parent, that routine must come from you.

Bedtime reading has a huge number of benefits from improved vocabulary and attention span, to the intimate, calm time which improves the child’s capacity for emotions like love and trust.

There’s a clear indication of a neurological difference between kids who have been regularly read to and kids who have not,” says G. Reid Lyon, Ph.D., chief of the child development and behaviour branch of the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development in Bethesda, MD.

The benefits are multi-faceted in that not only can your child learn from the contents of the book but also from the activity of reading itself.

Here are a few steps to help generate a love of reading from your child:

  1. Make reading a part of every night’s bedtime routine and don’t skip on it. If it’s getting late, choose a shorter book but don’t rush, remember this is calm time.

  1. Engage, bedtime reading shouldn’t be passive. Sure, pre-reading age, you will be the one saying the words. However, pointing out things from the text that are also shown in the pictures, helps children with association. Putting on voices for different characters is fun and will help your child’s imagination to bring the story to life.

  1. Let them choose. Even as adults we have favourite books that we hold dear, so let your child choose which story he or she wants each night. Yes, this might lead to the same few books being read over and over but repetition allows them to recognise patterns and sequences which can help develop logic skills.

  1. Make new books a treat. Aside from the fact books are often cheaper than the latest toy, you will likely more value and learning from them. They are certainly healthier than sweets! If your child has been good, reward them with a trip to a local bookstore where (with a little guidance), they can pick a new book for bedtime reading.

It’s vital that you continue to encourage your children with reading as they progress. It can be a hard jump from cosy, bedtime reading at home, to having to read in class or bringing home set reading that “has” to be done as homework. Children who struggle with reading or start to recognise they are behind their peers, can easily associate reading as something they are bad at and will not want to do it. There is no one-size-fits-all solution to this but as much as you can try, keep reading fun. Finally, don’t forget to lead by example and find some quiet time with a book of your own!

 

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Get Reading!

Get Reading

Here at The Right Tuition Company, we think that there is nothing better than reading a good book! There are hundreds of great book choices out there!

Here is a list of some of the most loved children‛s books from the past 100 years. They are suitable for children aged 9-11.

Please go to www.booktrust.org.uk to find out more about each story or to search for recommended books suitable for younger and older children.

Don‛t forget, your local library is a great resource for books. If they don‛t have a book you‛re looking for, they will find it for you.

Happy Reading from The Right Tuition Company!

 

Right Tuition Company Tunbridge Wells Rochester Sevenoaks

Why Choose Extra Tuition?

Why Choose Extra Tuition?

There are many reasons for investing in private tuition. Here are 10 things you can expect to benefit from:

1. Much smaller student to teacher ratio

Because private tuition takes place in small groups or one-to-one, students are able to focus better and are taught in a way that specifically meets their own unique needs. Here at Inicio, students attend in groups of up to six children, but teaching is always one-to-one.

2. The right tutor

At school, you don’t have a choice about your teachers, but we match the child and the tutor following our first meeting with the child. This means students have a mentor who teaches in the most effective manner for their learning styles.

3. Extra review

Often in school there is only a limited time to review a child’s work and understanding. That may not always be enough. Having a private tutor gives students an extra chance to review the areas in which they may be struggling.

4. Peer Discussion

Our small class learning environments encourage students to share ideas and discuss.

5. Test practice

For students who struggle with studying for tests, private tuition helps them to develop better study skills and ultimately to perform better in exams.

6. Confidence

Because tutors develop a more personal relationship with their students, they are able to see and cultivate the potential within them. This is all too easy for teachers in school to miss, especially if a child is well-behaved or of average intelligence. This gives students increased confidence in their studies.

7. Saves parents and students time and effort

Parents with busy schedules don’t always have time to help their children with school work. Having a private tutor takes the pressure off (although we would always encourage parents to spend time with their children wherever possible!).

8. Stronger drive to perform to their very best

Because private tuition means the instructor is really focused on the success of the student, students are far more likely to have an increased drive to perform to the very best of their ability.

9. Safe environment for open discussion

Sometimes students may not be as willing to ask questions in a large class, but working with a private tutor gives them more confidence and the freedom to speak out.

10. Students get taught by innovative methods

Because private tuition is one-to-one, tutors are willing to experiment with new teaching styles that work more effectively for the student.

 

If you feel you or your child could benefit from a private tutor in Rochester, Tunbridge Wells or Sevenoaks then why not visit one of our schools to see for yourself and to talk with our friendly staff about the options available.

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Parents Tips, Tricks and Tools Event

Parents Tips, Tricks and Tools Event

Parents’ Tips, Tricks and Tools Event

We are excited to be launching our Parents’ – Tips, Tricks and Tools event. It’s the perfect opportunity to learn some new techniques to encourage your child to study to the best of their ability.

We need to be more proactive in involving our young people in conversations about how they can approach learning. Here at The Right Tuition Company, we believe that from a young age, children need opportunities to learn about applying the right learning technique for the right task. These are teachable, learnable skills that we will equip you with at the event.

 

Parents’ Tips, Tricks and Tools

  • Revision of basic Maths topics such as fractions, decimals, averages, etc and how to explain these to your child;
  • Memory games, repetitions and methods to help your children to retain facts;
  • Ideas on how to create fun exercises at home to improve vocabulary;
  • The power of positive reinforcement!

Dates and times:

Rochester – Sunday 6 or 13 August 3.30pm – 5.30pm.

Cost: £15 per person. Limited spaces – booking required.

 

Homework And Assessment

Homework and Assessment

Homework and assessment need a PR revamp! These are two cornerstones of a child’s academic development. The former should never be treated as a chore and the latter should be approached without a smidgeon of fear.

Assessment of a child’s current level of progress can be experienced in a variety of ways; formal feedback from an education professional, tailored testing in order to identify areas of relative strength and weakness, national testing, group consultations between parent, pupil and teacher and, of course, homework itself. Assessment is essential towards, both, the achievement and recognition of progress.

Homework is a pivotal factor in enabling a child to consolidate the knowledge and skills that they have learnt in the classroom. Furthermore, not only does homework increase their capacity to become a productive, independent learner; however, homework, also, offers a parent an immediate insight into what their child is being taught and how well they are processing these ideas.

Ultimately, these two components should be embraced as a perfectly normal, yet vital, part of a child’s successful journey through education. Homework and assessment are the glue that unite all three parties – teaching professional, parent and pupil.

Here are six bullet-point suggestions for how to get the most out of these two vital areas of academe:

  • Resist the urge to do your child’s homework for them. This does not offer a true reflection of a child’s understanding of a topic. As a teacher, homework is the gateway to understanding whether a child has grasped a topic sufficiently.
  • Adhering to the principle of ‘little and often’ is the best approach. It is not a good idea to sit down for hours on end at a time. This will lead to a loathing of learning!
  • If possible, homework should be completed in a quiet space, wherever this can be found. Studies have shown that changing the place in which you choose to complete your homework encourages a fresh and revitalised approach.
  • Welcome assessment as a mere learning tool. It is the first stepping stone towards a child’s academic improvement. Confidence can be gained from the recognition of areas of achievement and, moreover, progress can be targeted in a systematic way by an assessment’s identification of gaps in knowledge.
  • Discuss assessment with your child in an open and relaxed manner. The greater the dialogue, the more a child will realise that assessments are not horrible tests; rather, they are helpful guides towards realising one’s full academic potential.
  • Constructive criticism, conveyed in a positive and correct manner, is not an enemy. Perfection is an idiotic pursuit, as it can never be achieved. Strive for progress, not perfection.

 

Spring and Summer Workshops and Revision Courses

Spring and Summer Workshops and Revision Courses

Rochester Workshops, Mock Assessments and Revision Courses

Call or email to book you place: 01634 814420 / rochester@right-tuition.co.uk

1. Year 5 / 3 hr Revision Courses
Tue 30 May – Maths revision (Revising Decimals, Fractions, Averages, Area, Perimeter, Volume, Percentages)
Wed 31 May – Problem Solving Workshop (Learning different methods and approaches to Maths problems)
Thu 1 June – Creative Writing (Revising Story, Script, News report, Diary, Letter, Leaflet formats)
Fri 2 June – Imagination Workshop (learning how to generate initial ideas and to plan relevant plot lines for creative writing)
Sat 3 June – Kent Comprehension and SPaG (revising technique)

2. 11+ Mock Assessments 
Medway and Kent paper sets available and include comprehensive report and post-assessment consultation.
Revision and assessment are open to registered and external pupils.
Mon 24 July
Tue 25 July
Wed 26 July
Morning and afternoon sessions available. 

Tunbridge Wells Workshops, Mock Assessments and Revision Courses

Call or email to book you place: 01892 800492 / tunbridgewells@right-tuition.co.uk

1. August 11+ Revision Courses
Tue 1 Aug – Fri 1 September
Hours
10-12pm Maths
12-1pm Verbal Reasoning
1-2pm Lunch
2-3pm Non Verbal Reasoning
3-4 English

2. 11+ Mock Assessments

Sun 4 June 10am-1pm

Sun 16 July 10am-1pm


Sevenoaks Workshops, Mock Assessments and Revision Courses

Call or email to book you place: 01732 441023 / sevenoaks@right-tuition.co.uk

1. 11+ Mock Assessment

Mon 29 May 10am-1pm

August 11+ Revision Classes

 

Our 11+ revision classes take place throughout the month of August. 

Our courses are designed in such a way so as to offer flexibility upon which day you can attend. Year after year, our August 11+ revision classes have been the vital catalyst towards ensuring that children achieve a positive result in September’s quiz. The classes give children comprehensive oversight of ALL aspects of the 11+ exam. In addition, these classes offer a healthy balance between the revision of essential and challenging 11+ topics, as well as a series of timed exercises. Our exclusive learning materials are developed in a way that reflect the precise nature and wording of the 11+ questions that they expect to face. The period between the end of the summer term and the beginning of the following academic year (the week when the date for the 11+ is, more often than not, set!) is a too long a time to neglect 11+ preparation. Our August revision classes are structured in a way that enables knowledge, skills and confidence to stay refreshed, topped up and further developed, whilst also allowing for those fundamental periods of rest and relaxation.

 

11+ Guidance

Overall Approach:

Supplementary learning, in the form of preparation for the 11+, should be carried out in a calm, systematic manner. A child must be taught in an inspiring way that aims to achieve a dual objective; consolidating knowledge and skills that are in tune with the national curriculum, whilst generating a love of learning that allows children to embrace those extra demands of the 11+ syllabus. In preparing for this quiz, the intention should always be to provide children with the core fundamentals of learning; the ability to problem solve and think logically, thus making a child a productive learner for the 11+ and beyond.

When should preparation begin?

If we take the avoidance of unnecessary hysteria to be the ultimate goal within 11+ preparation, like when preparing for anything in life, we want to avoid a mad rush. One extra hour a week (no more!), throughout Year 4, is incredibly helpful in introducing a child to the joys that can be gained through a stimulating form of supplementary education. With the demands presented by a vast national curriculum, Year 4 is vital in establishing those all-important solid foundations that will enable a child to hit the floor running when they enter Year 5. An extra hour a week can achieve four main things. It can cite gaps in knowledge that might have been missed as a result of the rapid coverage of topics at school, accelerate learning at a child’s own pace, help to maximise a child’s academic potential and discover a passion for learning.

The Year 5 journey:

These twelve months should be about receiving calm and professional advice, the opportunity to benefit from invigorating teaching, regular assessment and the development of new skills and confidence. The quiz needn’t be mentioned until June! The intention should be to build upon the progress achieved at school and relish the opportunity to learn new topics, such as reasoning, more advanced grammar rules, as well as Maths topics related to ratio, probability and algebra. With the popularity of after-school clubs and the fact that there are 168 hours in a week, two one-hour lessons a week, plus 45 minutes’ homework, is a relaxed and manageable amount of supplementary learning to undertake. The 11+ is not about succeed or fail. It is a mere barometer, serving to highlight whether a Grammar School is likely to be a suitable environment within which a child can learn and flourish at Secondary level.

Taking the sting out of the 11+

The angst that surrounds the 11+ can be tied to three principal vehicles. In triggering an open discussion around these three areas, one hopes that we can begin to reduce the irrepressible frenzy that girdles this pressing Tunbridge Wells topic.

  • Firstly, the vast majority of schools are inclined to disregard the issue and not talk about it; nor do they appear to offer any assistance to pupils or parents. This creates a secretive aura around the issue, which presents a significant challenge to parents regarding their knowledge of how preparation should be approached most effectively. As a consequence, a fervent atmosphere of competition can make it even trickier for parents to know what the best course of action should be. My advice would be to seek an informed opinion from a specialist within this domain and put on the ear-muffs at the school gates!
  • Secondly, our great nation’s media would do well to dig beneath the veneer of this issue and develop a more profound debate about ‘tutoring’, our approach to assessments as a nation and grammar schools at large. I would suggest that the 11+ narrative, as projected by the media, has become stuck in a vacuum. Within recent years, an ever-wider demographic have begun to gain access to supplementary learning, as rates have been driven down by the emerging prominence of small group learning. Nowadays, more children than ever are benefiting from a more diversified educational experience and, consequently, are having the ceiling of aspiration removed, thus enabling them to realise their true potential.
  • Lastly, it goes without saying that parents always have the absolute best intentions for their child; however, all too often, this can boil over, producing high degrees of anxiety that can filter down to the very people for whom they desire the best for. This tension can be alleviated by talking to professionals who specialise in the area of the 11+ and by making sure that discussions around this topic are always open, honest and frank.

Supplementary learning, in the form of preparation for the 11+, should be carried out in a calm, systematic manner. A child must be taught in an inspiring way that aims to achieve a dual objective; consolidating knowledge and skills that are in tune with the national curriculum, whilst generating a love of learning that allows children to embrace those extra demands of the 11+ syllabus. In preparing for this quiz, the intention should always be to instil children with the core fundamentals of learning; the ability to problem solve and think logically, thus making a child a productive learner for the 11+ and beyond.